Goodbyes
by Lady Shahd Khushrenada
Summary: short story, takes place after Zechs & Noin got to Cinq after "freeing" it from the Alliance power... Zechs remembering the things he's done to get there, while an unexpected surprise happens... Can't say more or I'll ruin it, so if you like Noin & Zechs romantic fics, you'll like this one. MOVING TO DEVIANTART. Anyone trying to get to my fics can get them there.
1. Chapter 1

_Disclaimer: I don't own Gundam wing._

_A\N: Ok, so this fic takes place after the Cinq kingdom "freeing" from under the Alliance power by Zechs but not before he left it. _

_Anyhow, I think I should admit this before you start reading; I wrote this fic without rewatching the episode, meaning I don't think that everything will be 100% accurate, so if I changed anything, please, humor me._

_Now, enjoy ^_* :_

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_**Goodbyes**_

"No! Relena!" Zechs screamed raising his body out of bed. It was a nightmare. He reached for the glass of water he always keeps at his nightstand. "Oh God," he whispered realizing he was shivering and his body was covered with sweat.

Ever since they came to Cinq, the nightmares never left him. It's been over than thirteen years now and he still remembers that night as it happened yesterday. He sighed as he reached for his room's balcony and opened its door; the air was cold, but it felt so good on his bare chest. He steeped outside, still thinking, he hadn't dreamt that nightmare in so long, he used to dream it every night after the fire that killed his parents, and caused him to leave his two years old sister; seeing her there crying and unable to get out of the flames, till that man jumps and saves her. Zechs didn't know who he was at first, but when he took him to his house and raised him with his son, he became more than a father to him; that man was Gerald Khushrenada, father of Treize Khushrenada.

But that nightmare stopped a long time ago, it stopped when he finally knew what to do, when he finally decided he was going to take revenge some day, he was going to make those people who killed his parents, took his sister away from him, and burned the kingdom of peace, pay.

Of course, no one knew about his plan, no one except for Treize, who promised he'd do everything to help him one day, and he did, he fulfilled his promise and gave him the chance to take his revenge at last.

Unfortunately, taking revenge was not as comforting as he thought it would be. No, not taking revenge alone, but coming here again after everything, after everything he had done.

He grabbed the cold edge of the balcony. "I failed him," he said no loader than a whisper_, I failed my father. I should be happy that he's dead and didn't get the chance to see what his son has become_. He added covering his face with his hands, suddenly feeling the need of his mask back on; he never takes it off, part in Noin's presence of course. But he had to take it off that night, he no longer needed it, but it felt like it became a part of his life, a part of himself, like he wasn't whole without wearing it.

Why did that dream had to come back tonight? He asked himself angrily, was he not supposed to take revenge for his parents? For his kingdom? Was it wrong for Milliardo Peacecraft to finally get out and take what was his? He felt like screaming out load of the pain burning inside of him reaching for answers. He thought that revenge will give him peace, but it didn't, it only made him more angry with himself, it made him realize who he was, it made him realize the things he has done to get here, the deaths he caused, the disasters he helped creating, abandoning his family's values and ideals of pacifism...

"What have I done? Who am I? Am I Milliardo Peacecraft the prince of peace, or Zechs Marques the lightning count?" he said to the cold night.

No, you're not Milliardo Peacecraft. He answered himself, Milliardo Peacecraft was Cinq's crowned prince, he was going to be the next king of peace, but he died a long time ago, he died with his parents that night thirteen years ago.

Now, the man who stood on this balcony was Zechs Marques, a soldier of OZ, a man whose hands were covered with blood, a man who was no better than the men who invaded the kingdom of peace years ago. Yes, he was an invader, this place wasn't his home anymore, he was foreign to it, and he needed to leave it as fast as possible.

This place belonged to his queen, to Relena, it belonged to her kind and beautiful heart and ideals of pacifism it held, it belonged to her innocence. She was this place -heck! This world! - last hope.

He had to leave, if it was in his hands he would have left the minute he killed that man, but Noin didn't let him, she insisted on him staying till his final recovery. She got doctors to see him and took care of him personally, she got him food to his room and made sure he took his meds on time.

He couldn't say no to her, she knew what she was to him, and never failed to use that on him whenever she wanted something.

It happened a long time ago, finding out his feelings for her, before that he had never thought it was possible to feel that way for anyone but once he saw her, it was no longer his choice.

He sighed in the freezing air and decided to grab a sweater if he was going to stay out there any longer. He went inside and took the sweater of the edge of the bed and wore it.

He wasn't supposed to feel that way, he thought getting back to where he stood earlier , he had always told himself, he would avenge his parents and not let anything get in the way till he does, but then she came, she got into his life, and he knew it won't be the same anymore.

He first met her at the academy, he was a couple of years older than she was, but she never failed to impress him with her abilities, no one was better than her, he enjoyed teasing her by getting higher marks in exams or finishing any task given to them faster than her, but he had to admit it, sometimes he doubted that she purposely let him win over her.

Of course, it wasn't long till he fell for her, and she knew it, they used to steal a few moments whenever they both had a break and stay alone, talking under the hot savanna sun. He used to take the mask off whenever they were alone, and she used just touch his face with her little fingers, as if not believing that he was real, it was difficult for him to imagine those same fingers holding the handles of a mobile suit and driving it with all that creativity.

He had told her everything in the end, she was the only person he couldn't hide it from, and she understood, though he thought she wasn't going to, she didn't judge him, she just listened as he told her about his childhood, about his sister, and about that night he lost everything. Then it was her turn, she told him her story, she told him how her family died that night too, how they died in the night of the Cinq kingdom invasion.

When she told him that, he felt like he found family, he felt that somehow, a part of his old life has returned to him, she was from Cinq too, she was from home.

Since then, whenever Zechs comes close to her, he smells home, and if he closed his eyes he could see it too, he could see his family, his home, the stolen laughs and distanced memories.

But it all needed to stop in the end, graduation day came closer than both of them wanted to believe, and he had to end it, he had to stop his feelings for her from destroying everything. He made it fast, he broke up with her the night he had to leave in, Treize had already found him his first mission, he was the first of their class to leave, so, he made it quick and left.

Of course, Noin, being Noin, didn't buy it, she knew that something was wrong, so she told him she'll wait, he told her it was in no use and tried to make her believe that he no longer wanted to be with her, but it was all in no use. Though a part of him always hoped she'd really wait for him, he didn't want her to waist her life waiting for a ghost, but it was his secret day dream, being able to lead a normal life with her away from all of this, however, it couldn't be done as long as he hadn't had his revenge yet.

She kept trying to contact him, for she -against everyone's expectations- decided to stay and teach at lake Victoria, he was shocked when he knew of her plane, but after all, Noin never listens to anyone, even him, so he left it as it was.

He didn't see her for a long time after, but then they needed to stay at the academy for a while and he had to see her again, she hadn't change one bit, but she got tougher, he could see that, even thought her motherly feelings for her soldiers never changed.

He couldn't help but to let his old feeling jump back again as soon as he saw her, she took him to the room her soldiers went to have "fun", she was clearly trying to flirt with him, and he was almost certain that if it wasn't for the attack by that Gundam pilot that night, something more would have happened.

Zechs thoughts stopped here, as he saw something moving in the garden that the balcony he stood on viewed, it was a kind of a blur, but his soldier instinct told him differently. It was a full moon night, and everything was clear under its silver light. So he jumped out of the edge of the balcony. It wasn't that far from the ground so it didn't quit cause him a problem, then walked to the way he saw the movement coming from.

"Who's there?" he asked as he came closer.

"Colonel? I thought I was the only one awake at this hour!" the familiar voice came from the end of the semi-road he took to the middle of the garden.

"Noin? What on earth..." he began.

"Oh! I'm sorry colonel, but the garden looked so tempting under the moon light, and I couldn't sleep," she said explaining.

"Noin, hadn't I told you to stop calling me colonel? We practically grow up together," he said reaching for the nearest bench he found and sat on it, the jump didn't quit "not cause a problem" he felt his wounds hurting him again.

"Oh," she said following and sitting next to him.

She didn't say anything else, but it was enough for him to know that he had said something wrong, Noin was good at hiding her feelings from everyone, but not from him, he knew her more than anyone.

"Come on, Noin. You know you're more than that to me," he told her holding her hand in his.

She shock her head and started to touch his face with her fingertips as she used to do whenever they were alone, as if just noticing his missing mask. "I know that very well," she smiled. "It's just that..." she stopped, leaning her face away from his and dropping her free hand from his face.

"What is it?" he whispered, trying to observe her features in the dim light.

She lifted her head again to look at his eyes, "I thought that now that you had what you wanted that..." she stopped again, not knowing how to continue.

He didn't know what to say, she still remembers, she's still waiting for him. "Noin..." he finally began, but stopped as well. She was crying, he could feel it even if not see it.

"Don't." she said trying to hide her tears with a little smile, then failing. "Don't Zechs, if you are going to say goodbye again, then don't" she looked away again. "If you were going to leave, then just leave this time, please..." she couldn't continue, her voice broke against her well and the tears took the best part of her.

Zechs couldn't take it any longer, he moved her face to meet his, and let his lips find hers. She was surprised at first but then kissed him back. He could taste her tears, but that didn't matter, it felt like it's been a life time since he last kissed her, her lips were even sweeter than he remembers they ever were.

He moved his hands to support her body against his as their kiss deepened, and she moved hers, let one wonder through his long blond hair and the other rested around his neck.

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"Are you asleep?" she whispered raising her head to be able to see his face as it was resting on his chest. He half opened his eyes to look at hers. She smiled as he moved his hand to brush her cheek.

"I'm sorry," he whispered after a while, but his voice disappeared and he didn't know how to continue, for what he was sorry, he did not know, maybe for doing all of this to her, for hurting her by his constant goodbyes, maybe he needed to apologize before it was too late, he needed to apologize as long as he had the chance to.

"Zechs, you don't need to apologize for anything." she whispered back as well, "when I loved you, I knew what I was signing up for." she finished joking.

He didn't laugh, just tried to make a smile but failed. "When you said you'll wait, I didn't think you'll really do it." he confessed.

She smiled to him, "you know that I'll wait forever if I needed to, and some day, some day Zechs, you will come back to me, you will, I know it" she finished closing her eyes, as if imagining what their life would be like if he ever does "come back".

He didn't say anything to her, but didn't want anything more than believing her; he wanted to believe that so badly.

A couple of minutes passed, without one of them saying anything, she re put her head on his chest. He didn't close his eyes again, he didn't want this night to end, any extra moment with her was more precious than anything else.

She moved her head a little and he could smell her hair, it smelt like her favorite herbal shampoo, and immediately, that feeling of being home again occupied him, he closed his eyes and he could see his family, he could see them there, waiting for him.

"You know, being near you had always made me feel at home." he said no louder than a whisper.

"Why?"

"At first, I thought it was because you were from here too, from Cinq, but now, I know it's not only that." she lifted her head again to look at his again as he spoke. "It's because my home has been always where you are, Noin. Not anywhere else." he took her hand in his and locked his fingers with hers. "Home is where we find our beloved ones, and the big proof is this, since we got here, I never felt like I'm home, but then once I get close to you, I can feel like I went back to those times again".

She smiled to him, just the thought of making him happy, made her happy as well. "I'm glad that I do."

"You can't imagine how that feels like." he answered, closing his eyes, inhaling.

She closed her eyes as well not wanting to think, she didn't want to think about the next morning, nor did he. They didn't want to think about the possibility that the very next morning their goodbye will come, but Noin knew that even if the couldn't see each other for a while, their hearts will always whisper each other names forever...

The end.

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_So, how was it? Did I screw up the original events so much? :P . Well, anyway, I kind of wrote this in a hurry; I actually wrote it when I was supposed to be studying pharmacology instead, but, oh well, when is a better time to write fanfic than when you are supposed to study? XP _

_Please make sure to leave a review, I really need some constructive criticism of my writing! _

_As usual, sorry for any grammar or spelling mistakes. _

_~Sh_


	2. Chapter 2

_**A\N:**_ I know I said this fic would be a one-shot, but I couldn't resist adding another chapter :P, it's just something I though of adding after I read the first chapter, so enjoy and don't forget to review ^_*:

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**_Chapter 2_**

When Noin opened her eyes again she had no idea where she was, she looked around and everything from the night before came rushing to her. She was at Zechs's bedroom at the Cinq castle. All the soldiers were currently staying there, it was destroyed for the most part, but Zechs insisted on them not going deeper into the city. It was a rather odd decision, since, mostly, when OZ takes any territory from under the Alliance rule, they make sure to spread the organization's soldiers between the people, it was OZ's policy, trying to show their power and that they were in charge now. The soldiers were a little astonished of their commander's decision, but Noin knew better, she knew Zechs very well to tell the motivations of his action; he didn't want to violate the sanctity of the kingdom of peace, it was a decision coming more of guilt than anything else, it was a last attempt to try to make it up for the things he has done to get revenge for his family, a last attempt to hold on to even a fracture of the ideals of pacifism his family held for centuries.

She was alone, the bed sheets were cold, which meant he must have left along time before she awoke. She stood up and wore her clothes in a hurry, she didn't want to think of what might happen if one of the soldiers decided to open the door and found her there.

When she was finished dressing she glanced in the mirror fixing her uniform, then headed to the door as she suddenly noticed the opposite wall of it, it was a little odd; not that she expected anything else from an old, almost burned down castle, but there was something in the way the wall stood. She walked to it and just then; it moved! The part of the wall she meant to touch just moved by its own, she stepped back as the wall that turned to a door, it was opened and Zechs got out.

She breathed heavily as he smiled at her site, "God! Zechs! You scared the heck out of me!" she put her hand on her chest as she spoke.

His smile grow wider, "I didn't think you'd be awake yet."

"Why? Did you plan to scare me to death while still in bed?"

He laughed, "No," he loved Noin's sense of humor the best, "I just wanted to make sure it was still there before I could show it to you."

"What's that?" she asked.

"I'll show you." he said taking her hand in his and headed to the 'tunnel' that laid behind him through the door.

"Zechs.." she tried to protest, but then gave it up when he continued walking not listening to what she was saying.

They walked like that for about fifteen minutes, and after a few minutes, Noin actually thought that they were lost, but Zech's confident steps told her differently, it was then that they reached the end of the tunnel and Zechs reached to something on the wall that blocked their way, and then it was opened.

When Zechs was out of her way, she had to close her eyes to protect them from the strong light that embraced their faces, she blinked realizing that the light was only sun rays, when her vision was clear enough, she looked around, they were behind the castle, the exact opposite direction of Zechs's bedroom.

"Zechs! How did you.." she began when she saw his wide grin at her site, she looked around while he just stared at her.

"Those tunnels were made for the royal family to escape in case something happened inside the palace, my father showed them to me when I was about six. It was the way I managed to escape the fire that night." He answered while closing the door behind them. "I didn't know it would be still there after all this time. You know, the room we were in is the same of my childhood."

She could feel the hurt in his voice from remembering though he wasn't even looking at her. "So, is that what you wanted to show me?" she then said.

"No," he simply answered then turned smiling at her knowing she was only trying to change the subject. "Come on, from here," he then added leading the way in the opposite direction Noin knew the city was in, he was heading to the wood that surrounded the castle.

"Zechs, will you at least tell me where we are going?" she asked after a while when they just kept getting deeper through the wood, he was walking in the same confident from the tunnel, so she followed silently but when they kept walking for more than fifteen minutes, she started to get worried.

"Don't you trust me?" he answered turning his head back as she was following him, he gave her the look that used to charm all the girls back when they were still in the academy before he choose to wear that mask, it's been so long since she saw that look in his eyes that it actually made her forget how to breath.

He smiled when she just stared and -for the first time in a long time- flushed red, "No, it's just..." she murmured a few syllables, He laughed of her. She thought she had overcome her old crush for him, since they actually started going out together! But apparently no matter how much time passes she'll never able to control herself around him, ever.

"Here we are." He finally announced.

She looked around her; she wasn't really paying much attention to where he was leading her. They stood on the edge of a small lake, it had a little water fall in the other side, the place felt isolated from the outer world, she even doubted if anyone might find it if they didn't know what they were looking for.

"What do you think?" he asked. She turned to face him, he wasn't even looking around like she was, he was only staring at her, which made her flush a little. "It's amazing," she murmured awestruck and still gazing at the water, it was so clear and tempting for you to reach your hand and just touch the surface.

"I used to come here as a child," he added when she went to the water, "Be careful," he warned when she was close enough. She gave him a look, and he laughed.

They sat by the lack for a while afterwards; Noin couldn't decide which was more beautiful; the lake or the eyes of the man she loved more than anything, which she hasn't seen in what felt like ages. They talked; about everything, their lives after they left the academy, she told him about her students back at the academy, he told her how he about how every night before he goes to sleep he thinks of her, of their days together, of everything they shared.

After that, they just sat silent, she lent her head back on his chest and he surrounded her with his arms, "I used to come here a lot, I got my tutors mad by skipping classes and just disappear," he laughed.

"_You_? Skipping classes?" It was the first time he ever tells her about these things, she could hardly imagine Zechs as a trouble making child.

He laughed of the way she said it and turned her in his arms to face him, "Well, let's say I wasn't always the charming, good-looking first on class kid."

She was amazed of his move but smiled of his comment, "You weren't always first on class," she teased to hide the effect of his gaze on her.

He laughed, "So, you admit that I'm charming and good-looking?" he teased as well, she blushed again, why does he have to turn everything back on her? He laughed again, and got her face closer to his so he could brush his lips on hers, "I did graduate first on class, didn't I?" he teased again.

She rolled her eyes on him but she was happy he changed the subject of her old crush on him in the academy, apparently, back then, she was the only person who didn't know that he knew of her crush for him, "You really have some interesting secrets still, don't you?" she tried to change the subject again, if she lets him continue she'll end up admitting that she changed a few answers she perfectly knew in the finals just to help him.

"Noin, there're still a few things you don't know about me," he smiled. "Now, can we take a more appropriate position so I could show you something?" he shifted her again in his arms, only this time to make her sit infront of him. She didn't resist and sat waiting to see what he had.

"I wanted to give you this," he said as he pulled an amazing ring of his pocket, he rested it on his palm. It was a marvelous golden ring with a huge brown stone in the middle, and two rows of smaller stones coming from the corner, hugging the big one in the middle. Noin couldn't speak, she only absorbed the stones glittering under the sun rays.

"What do you think?" he asked when she said nothing.

"Zechs.. I'm speechless, are you giving this to _me_?" she looked up to meet his eyes, he nodded smiling, "where did you get it from?" she asked.

He held the ring between his fingers and slid it in her finger, "It was my mother's," he held her hand in his, they absorbed its beauty together, "I found it in her room the other night, I don't know how the Alliance soldiers missed it. It seems they took everything else."

"Zechs, I can't take it. It's the only thing you have of your mother, I can't.." she started while looking at it in her finger.

"You don't understand," still smiling he moved her head up so he could see her eyes. "This ring belongs to Cinq queen, not just my mother; it passes from each queen to the other. Before the war in a few days, my mother told me about it, she said that someday I'll give it to the woman I choose to be by my side, she had no idea what will happen in just a couple of days," he sighed, and frowned a little, "But I still remember what she told me, and if I would ever choose anyone, it'll be you Noin. If this war's ever over, I want nothing but being with you away from all of this." He smiled again, this time she was really speechless, she only looked at his eyes.

But what she didn't know, that there hardly were anything to say, just the look of his eyes to hers told everything, he wanted her to be his queen, he wanted her to share his life with him, it was just enough for her, this hope will be the only thing that'll get her through the war, even if he wasn't by her side. They'll always find their way to each other.

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Please make sure to review, I'd really appreciate any feed-back, even if you simply said you read it. Thank you ;)


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